Friday, October 31, 2008

Do you believe in Magick?

I do....all kinds of magick. Take for example a seed. You bury a seed in the ground. Provide some water, some sun, and BOOM, something totally new emerges. I am amazed by that, every single time I think of it.

Birth is magick - those squirmy wormers are growing fatter by the day. (Here's a new picture for all you bay-bee animals lovers.)

Our bodies are magick - the way they work, the way they know what to do without us telling them directly. Life is FULL of it.

Here's some of my personal magick -

One evening, hubby and I went to the park to read and play cards while daughter was at youth group. The place we usually sat overlooked horse stables. A horse neighed - hubby said (and I quote), "That's the first time I ever heard a horse neigh....well except for on TV." The next day we decided to go to a local farm (Linvilla Orchards, Delaware County, PA). As we were walking around, we came upon the area where the animals lived. A horse neighed - daughter said (and I quote), "That's the first time I ever heard a horse neigh....well except for on TV." !!! Hubby and I laughed. She said, "What?" We said, "I/he just said the exact same thing last night."

On the way to a friend's house, "Everybody have fun tonight (everybody wang chung tonight)" was on the radio. It reminded me that Frazier from Cheers once sang that in the bar. I stopped at a stop sign on Cherry Tree Road and happened to look at the cross-street sign. It said Frazer

I was in my room, while hubby and daughter were watching TV in the other room, writing in my journal. The radio was on. "Pink Cadillac" came on. I didn't particularly like the song, but I left it on. I changed the channel a few minutes later and that same song was on again. I thought it strange and something (don't know what) prompted me to write "Pink Cadillac" in my journal. Eventually, I went out with the others. They were flipping through the channels. The movie "Fletch 2" was on. Daughter passed it and I said, "Hey go back." She did. A moment later, Fletch uncovered a car. I said, "Is that a pink cadillac?" Hubby said, "Yeah."

The story of Binx: We had a cat named KC who died. My mother's hairdresser offered us a black cat she'd found outside. I'd always wanted a black cat, but didn't feel ready at the time. Over the next few weeks, it was obvious that Rowan (our other cat) was lonely. We decided to take up the hairdresser's offer. When we went to pick the kitten up, we sat down to chat. I noticed a tattoo on her arm - it had the letters KC in it. I pointed it out to hubby and daughter. On the way home, we passed a truck from a local business - KC Signs. We stopped at WaWa. A jeep was parked backward. The letters KC were on the headlights.

Before I left for the book store, I grabbed the SARK books I had in a pile on the desk. A note I had written fluttered out onto the floor. It said, "Any way you want it." On the way home, I heard that song.

I have a list of words (some are circled in my journal) that I happen to hear in a song while I am writing that exact word.

While I was out driving I swear I saw God wearing a bird suit! I happened to look in the rear view mirror and saw a bird and playing on the radio a song said, "Look over your shoulder, I’ll be there" as I did. Freaked me out a little.

An entry from my journal when I was at the book store: Earlier a woman was talking very loudly on a cell phone at the book store. It didn’t really bother me, but I could hear what she was saying loud and clear. Something about christmas gifts. And she said, "Cats with a z" She said that twice before she left. I did feel a little relieved to have ‘silence’ once again. So, just now while reading ‘a year by the sea’ by Joan Anderson, I see ‘The postmistress, whose cat, Zipcode..." Cat Z.

Another experience at the book store: While at the book store with Dee, I found another book by Paulo Coelho. I loved his others. So, here I was reading it and it said, "I remember my magic moment..." and the song playing in the background at the book store was "This magic moment!"

Yet, Another book store experience: Daughter was at youth group again. Hubby and I went to the, you guessed it, book store. I went to my usual section ~ Self Help ~ ;). I looked at this and that, then decided to go to the potty. On my way back into the section, I noticed a book titled: "Chasing Daylight" by Eugene O'Kelly. A secondary title explained that the author knew he was going to die. The back noted that he was the CEO of KPMG - a large accounting firm. This was the firm that my previous workplace had started using after the fall of their usual firm. So it caught my eye - I opened the book to see if I would find some special words for me. First thing I noticed was that the book was upside down inside the cover jacket. I flipped and flipped - nothing. So I put it back on the shelf. I started to walk away. A thought came to me "I should fix that upside down book." As I took the cover off, a notecard fell out. Here are some pictures of it.

The envelop says "Open and expand your mind." Inside it says, "Sip by sip, life's a trip! Hope you enjoy yours! or are enjoying. And remember..."Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth." ~ Alan Watts"

What a GREAT thing to happen! And very timely for me too - This happened to me on a Monday. The Friday before that, I was asking The Universe "Who am I?" I was trying to define the un-define-able. Duh.

I have that note glued inside an old journal. I'll keep it until I die and then I'll tell the story when I reach the other side. I still love that person for leaving that note - one day I will do the same thing because it is on my list of precious things that have happened to me.

Okay: These events may seem silly to some people, not to me. Life is so much more fun when you take magick seriously. Some people may call them coincidence, serendipity ~ I call them magick. I've gotten into the idea of naming what happens in my life, Repeaters. They are things that repeat, like an echo. I don't think they individually mean anything specific....I simply look at them as markers on my path. If I see/notice these happenings, than I'm on the correct path. I feel that they are a reassurance that was gifted to me by The Universe. I adore this about my life. It is one of the reasons I would NEVER change lives with anyone!

(here is a note I wrote in my journal about these experiences) In a chakra book I have it talks about the 3rd eye...mine tingles often...often enough for me to know it. I began to feel this tingle after a Reiki session years ago. In the book it says, "Ability to perceive patterns, to "see." That seems so like this magick. They seem more like patterns, not necessarily signs of the future, but more like a road map.
Here's what I think: Magick isn’t always obvious, but if sought, it is found in every single moment. We just have to SEE it, NOTICE it, LOVE it, LIVE it, BE it.

~As always, Magickally Delicious~

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Reflections of our~selves

Can we ever truly have a vision of our own self? Certainly we cannot truly see what our own face looks like. Mirrors are reversed. Spoons reflect us upside down. Pictures, video, paintings - all dimensionally incorrect. They cannot capture the full scope of our faces. Even our own eyes reverse everything and turn it upside down first then the brain interprets it correctly (that's right, right?) So, if we cannot ever truly see our own face - if we can only have an idea of what we physically look like, not an exact does that translate to mentally, emotionally, spiritually? Is it ever possible to have a correct idea of Who We Are? What do you think??

Taking and putting up pictures of myself is a stretch for me. I just don't like pictures of me. But whatever...I'm sure it's just that stupid pain in the butt voice in my head trying to keep me from having a good time and accepting myself. (Shut up you!)

Well, here goes....I'm wearing the project that I mentioned I was working on. I'm calling them scrappy scarves (perhaps I'll put them in my Etsy shop). I heart them BIG. This is also a better picture of my half purple hair.

As you can see, my natural color has grown in. The last time I had it cut and bleached was in January. Honestly, I can say I will do it again. But for now, I'm waiting for my natural color to grow back in. I need a break from having to color my hair every other month.

I'm suddenly feeling kinda quiet. Maybe I'm tired. My daughter just came in and gave me an attitude about locking the front door. I think I need a nappy.

~Beauty - full - ness~

ps: about my earlier thought (a vision of our self)....perhaps it's like everything else...close enough is close enough. anything else would be asking for perfect. and we all know that here, on our beautiful Earth, imperfect IS perfect.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Male, male, and more male

Well it looks like Tristan, Binx, Zoe, ??, and I are outnumbered. We did the 'sex' role-call last night and the final tally: 4 boys, 1 girl.

So for the boys: Hubby, Rowan, Wentz, Mooka, and 4 (as of now) un-named bay-bees. Total: 8

The girls: Moi, Tristan, Binx, Zoe, and 1 (as of now) un-named bay-bee. Total: 5

WHA???? How did that happen?? When did we lose control? Oh least one of my dreams has come to fruition - I AM SURROUNDED BY ADORING MEN, even if they are mostly cats! heehee

Over the weekend we drove to our old neighborhood (an hour away) to get the poopy scared out of us at Arasapha Farm. They put on such a fantastic show. We so love being scared. :)

Speaking of poopy - it's really funny what reminds you of home. Living out in the country, there are all kinds of smells. We drove past a farm and the smell of cow stuff wafted in the vents. I turned to my husband and said, "It smells like our bedroom." Sadly, he agreed. Oh, those kittens are super cute, but they do have a stanky downside. I guess my hubby's favorite book applies here - "Everybody Poops." Sometimes, I'm actually a little glad for my newly acquired allergies. I leave this conversation with the following wisdom: All good and bad things come to those who can smell.

My plan for the day: taking pictures for my Etsy shop (it's almost ready and there will be a give-away for the Grand Opening - stay tuned), working on a new project (I'll put pictures of that up as soon as it's done), paying attention to cats and cats and more cats, working on a Halloweener post (of sorts).

Wha'chu doin'?

I'll just be here in my fuzzy slippers.....
(that right one needs a brushing)

~Fuzz On~

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Squirmy Wormers update

A week ago, they were here.

Now they're here.

We have a pile of kittens under our bed. Tomorrow the bay-bees will be a week old. Went fast. Last night, we noticed one had one partially opened eye. Pretty soon they'll all be open and then they'll be getting into all kinds of kitten trouble.

So far we've got one boy and one girl. I haven't been able to see what the rest are because every time I pick them up they squeal - I don't want to upset's not worth it. We'll find out eventually.

It's another blustery day in PA. Those kittens would have been freezing their nips off outside. I honestly don't think all of them would have survived. Lucky ducks, I mean kittens.

~Sweet Lil Kitten Faces~

Monday, October 27, 2008

Perfect Partners

Some of this is a little scattered......and I so don't mean to sound preachy or that I know it all. I just want to share what I've learned in this area or what I believe because I know it's helped me to enjoy the healthy and happy relationship that I am in. Here goes:

So often we look at other people's lives or read their blogs and think that what they have is perfect. I have fallen into this trap on many occasions (not just in blog-land, but in 'real-land' too). I am getting better at recognizing the falsity of the thought when it comes up and recalling the understanding that we all have 'issues, problems' (whatever you want to call them), there are potential pitfalls in every journey, and whatever that person has or doesn't have comes with it's own 'price.'

As far as my partner being perfect - he'd say NO and I'd say "He's perfect for ME because I CHOOSE for him to be." Oh, we've had our troubles. Most of them are far and away, but resurface every once in awhile. There were a lot of 'dreams' I had to give up for the health of this relationship, myself, my partner, and my daughter. My husband wasn't my dream husband (are they ever? perhaps sometimes for some people - but I'd venture a guess that for the most part they aren't). After a few years of torture, I realized that that dream guy may look tasty, may say things that melt my clothes off, and may be strong in spirit - BUT HE ISN'T REAL and even IF he was, perhaps he'd have other qualities that didn't allow me to live my best life. For many years, I chose that type of guy and IT NEVER WORKED OUT. I spent my time being upset for one reason or another - he lied, he cheated, he ignored me, he ignored my daughter, he only wanted sex, things changed between us because he couldn't keep up the act (because he wasn't being his real self, only a self that would get me in bed), he was jealous of things I wanted to do, he pushed me away, he was controlling, abusive mentally, emotionally, physically....and the list goes on.

Here's a brief synopsis of how we got together: We worked together for years. He liked me from the first moment he saw me. Then he realized I was dating another co-worker. We became friends and remained so for several years. It took me some time to recognize his feelings, but we never spoke directly of them...until one night we were hanging out. I was single at the time. We hung out a few times, but I wasn't ready yet. I asked if we could go back to being friends. We did. I went back to the co-worker. We reached a place again when it wasn't working out. So, I began to think - instead of getting together with someone who I like and trying to get them to like me.....why don't I get together with someone who likes ME for Who I Am already and see what happens?? That singular idea is where this 'perfect' relationship began.

My husband allows and helps me to live my best life because he knows, understands, embraces, and even likes Who I Am. I can't ask for more than that. But I had to choose to allow it first. I had to decide that the heart, the soul, the character inside of him is more important than the rest.

When we first got together, no one would have believed that we are as happy, as solid as we are. I was really into the idea that we choose partners who remind us of our childhood relationships. We choose these people in order to resolve the painfull parts. I shared this idea with him. We talked a lot about things like that. Both of our families are fraught with relationship troubles. And WE DIDN'T WANT TO REPEAT THEIR MISTAKES or LIVE THEIR F'ED UP LIVES. We'd seen how it turned out and instead of doing the same stupid things, we did something else in hopes that it would work out better. (and I'm happy to say "It has." :)

I would imagine people (even my so-called friends and ex-family) thought/said the following: The bitch with the nice guy. She's using him. He'll do whatever she says, she's going to use that against him. She's going to control him. She's going to get bored of him being so nice and leave. She's going to cheat on him. It will never work. She doesn't love him (that WAS said to me). I feel bad for him (which was also said in a conversation about us when I wasn't present).

Stu and I spoke about that 'stuff' over the years and honestly, we laughed at them all because they really had no idea what they're talking about. They didn't KNOW us. They didn't spend time with us as a couple. Their own relationships were either in a smoking pile of rubble (way beyond repair), well on their way to a smoking pile of rubble, or none existent. Who the heck were they to judge???

My friend says I have to have "the patience of a saint" with him. The reason: he does a lot of things that appear 'dumb' to me. For example, last night - we're cooking dinner together (cause he doesn't have a problem doing or helping to do anything around the house - that's one of his really good qualities). I was going to ask our daughter to cook the rice, but I asked him to do it because "she'll ask me a million questions even though the directions are right on the box." He said, "I'll probably ask you a million questions too." I said, "The directions are right on the box." So, I'm cutting veggies (cause I wouldn't ask him to do that - I kinda like him with fingers) and I see, out of the corner of my eye, him at the sink directly filling the pot up with water. I said, "What are you doing?" He said, "It says to boil the water." I look at the box and see the table which clearly displays a certain amount of rice and a certain amount of water. I say, "What, just water? Not a certain amount of water?" He looks at the box....."Oh." Now, what he did wasn't a huge deal, but piled on top of a million other similar situations ~ sometimes it gets annoying and I usually don't hesitate to tell him so - which is why I said, "We have to have the patience of saints with each other.' I'm no picnic all the time either.

There are other 'issues' in our relationship that are much too private to go into, but believe me, they are there. We just don't allow them to ruin the rest. Other people probably would. The past me would have and tried to. But because we got together at the 'perfect' time for me- when I was ready to get out of the fairy tale idea of relationships and get into a real relationship - and he is just one of those 'nice guys' who always wants things to work has worked out. Where we will go from here - I have no idea - but I have a feeling that it's only going to get better and better.

I also have the feeling that the choice to remain in this relationship will be made again and again because that's how Life goes. The re-cognition that what's good here is really good for us and the 'bad' parts just come with the good package will re-turned to and re-examined and re-membered. It's like going to a restaurant and seeing a steak with a baked potato. Well, perhaps you wanted fries, but it doesn't come with fries, it comes with a baked potato. So, you think, "Do I want that steak enough to have a baked potato and not fries, OR do I want the fries so much that it's worth changing to something else???" I'm loving the baked potato it is!

So often our society is concerned with LOVE. Love is complicated - I believe I read this idea in Conversations with God: Love is like white light. When it shines through a prism a rainbow appears. All the colors that are contained in that white light show, blue, orange, purple, green, yellow. I believe many of us are confused about what LOVE is. Not that I know exactly or that I haven't been or will be in the future....but I know this, fighting is in's part of the Love. I suppose I concern myself mostly with the liking of my partner. I like him. I like Who He Is. I don't particularly care for all of his characteristics and I'm sure some of mine get on his nerves (he just doesn't say so because it's not his nature)....but still, I like him. Love is like the ocean....ebbing and flowing, rippling, ever moving, even in the smallest way. Like is still. I either like someone or I don't. The way I determine that is through their actions. Has he done things that have hurt me emotionally? YES. YES. Mentally? YES. YES. Physically? YES. YES. (like when we wrestle - not talking physical violence here) But the thing about it is this: Because I know him deeply, I understand that there is no 'on purpose' in his 'hurtfull' actions. So, I do not interpret him as trying to hurt me. Anything he does is accidental or perhaps he wasn't thinking. These things are 'easily' let go.

I see our entire relationship as Divinely Planned. Throughout both of our separate journeys we were prepared, we were taught through a series of painful situations. The purpose ~ so that we would know how to appreciate the GOOD and gracefully accept the bad that surely comes with it.

Basically, in my experience, there are no perfect partners, only ones who are perfect enough. Check out the movie "The Story of Us."


Friday, October 24, 2008

Soaking IN Purple

In honor of Claudia and her lovely hair.

Lately, I've been doing this.

And even some of this.

Don't forget about this......

and that.

~Mmmmmm, purpley goodness~

Thursday, October 23, 2008

The BESTEST Anniversary present EVER....or squirmy wormers

It finally happened! All these days and weeks we waited. The day finally arrived when those squirmy wormers that were in Zoe's belly came out to see the world! ~YAY~ and it was on our Anniversary. It was a great day!! I spent most of the day watching and helping her....she must have been exhausted cause I was so tired out I went to bed early.

There's 5 - a black and white, a black, a marbled black and white/gray, and two darker stripped ones that look like Mommy (pictured below). Super cute! They're all doing well.

See the teeny tiny kitten leg and tail in between Zoe's leg and tail? For those of you who've never seen them when they're first born...WOW are they small!

I keep telling the other cats we have that they are uncles and an aunt. Heehee...Rowan is Uncle Dittle.
What a blessing and a treat and total honor it's been! I'm glad we're the kind of people who would take in a pregnant outside cat. I'm looking forward to seeing who these lil squirmy wormers become.
~Newly Born LIFE~

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

4 YEARS! that's my favorite number

Well, today it's been 4 years since I married the goof-ball I'm married to. For some reason, this year, I'm able to remember how long it's been. Usually I have to ask him - which is quite a reversal from the 'typical' marriage....usually the woman knows and the man is clueless. I also usually have trouble remembering how long I've been on this Earth. Again, for some reason this year I know next month it will be 36 years. I'm not a numbers kind of gal - I married an accountant, let him do the math. I guess I don't focus on the amount of time, I focus on the time itself when it is happening. I don't care how long we've been married, as long as we're having a good time.

And we's not a romantic kind of story. I always thought I was into romance. Turns out I'm not. I'm into laughing and companioning.

He makes me laugh. I make him laugh. Our daughter makes us laugh. We make her laugh. The cats make us laugh. I believe them to laugh at us quite often. We are laughing fools! I love it.

Could I ask for more?

Well, I have. I've demanded 'it'. I've not lived my life because I didn't have 'it'. I made all of us suffer because of 'it'. And there are still times 'it' floats around in my head.

But 'it' isn't here.

BUT what IS here is more grand than I could have ever imagined for myself. I can trust him like no one else (for the most part....I can't trust him to fix something without me playing supervisor so he doesn't make the house explode, but that's a small price to pay). I know he can trust me. We believe in each other. We are so often on the same page or pretty darn close that it's uncanny. We both just want to enjoy our lives without having to act out some sick, petty script that's been written for us by some people we know. We play cards together. We play video games together. We watch TV together. We clean up together. We do yard work together. We shop together. We are together all the time. Now, some people may think that unhealthy....but hey, we have already spent more time in our lives without each other than together, so until the reverse is true we'll keep hanging out.

I never would have married someone funny on purpose. But I'm not always as wise as I think I am. He thinks nothing of making himself appear a fool out in public just to get me to laugh. Now that I think of it, perhaps there IS romance here.

Happy Anniversary Love! You're the bestest guy I could have ever married. I'll be ever great~full that I did even if you do a billion more 'stupid' things!! We rock!

"Holy Mother of God! Every damn time! Oh, it's a bad one!" ::giggle::


Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Find Your Breath

My yoga teacher kept saying that last night. Find your breath. I remembered something I re-learned during our vacation to Myrtle Beach, SC.

I am not a mouse. I am a Wolf. I don't have to try to be a mouse because it is not my nature. Nor do I have to try to be a wolf...I just am. I am kind. I am forgiving. I seek to enjoy life with those around me with harm to none. BUT, not everyone else is kind or 'deserves' forgiving (I'm hesitant to say it that way, but see my explanation later*) or seeks to enjoy life with harm to none. There ARE others out there who lie, play games, manipulate, and WORSE. I cannot be a party to that. I have no desire to have those kinds of others in my life. They make trouble, they are trouble-makers. I do not bring trouble to other people's lives (if I do, it is completely accidental) and I don't put up with others who do do it on purpose or with purpose. *There ARE people who will kick you and say sorry and kick you and say sorry and kick you and say sorry and kick you and say sorry and kick you and say get the picture. I do my best to let go of the injury, but I do not allow them back (unless they make some GRAND kind of gesture and show that they have changed.....this has never happened to me.....yet, but I'm open to the possibility). In my experience, forgiveness isn't something you can do just's done and then done again and when that injury pops up, it's done again and a few months later, again. I have never forgiven someone for doing something to me (that I felt needed forgiveness, we're not talking they accidentally stepped on my foot here) and only had to let it go once - I've had to re-inspect the wound, clean it out...again, put some healing ointment on it, and let it scar over and be, until it was opened again.

I've been exposed to a lot of ~world peace~ kind of talk. Let me say this: I DO NOT BELIEVE IN WORLD PEACE. It's not that I wouldn't want it or that it doesn't sound lovely. I just do not believe in the possibility here on Earth. For example: IF there was world peace....would there be abortion?? would there be porn?? would there be loud motorcycles (cause those things disturb me deeply)?? Would there ever come a time when we'd all agree - "That's it, no more abortion, no more porn, and no more loud motorcycles!" ~YAY~ the crowd goes wild! I don't see it happening. Besides, I'm more into ~BALANCE~ there is no up without down, no left without right. No peace without non-peace.

Most of the people I've come across in this journey have acted as if there is something wrong with my nature. They said I should be a different way. Inside this created a struggle, which has lasted many years and caused me far too much pain. I have fought with the idea of letting things go every time, not taking things personally every time, realizing I don't have to get upset about how someone else is acting every time....being a mouse (no offense to the mouse). I would usually fail and feel like a jerk - this painfull yuck in my chest - not because I WAS a jerk, but because of the self doubt placed inside by these mice. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with those things, but I feel all things in balance ~ there is a time for me to ignore someone who is kicking me or to believe that they didn't mean it AND there is also a time for me to turn around, narrow my gaze at them, growl and spit and lunge because I KNOW those ten kicks were on purpose!

I embrace this about Me. It's not for everyone. But I'm the counter-balance for some of those mice out there and also for those out of balance rabid wolves.

I do not condone violence, but I feel it is necessary in some cases. Bullies don't always stop talking until someone comes along and punches them in the mouth. Even "Little House on the Prairie" - a show full of values - has had many episodes displaying this 'fact'. My all time favorite episode: They had money troubles. Pa had to work several crap being cleaning out stables. Snobby Nellie and brother teased Laura about how he smelled like a dirty horse. Laura got upset. Pa set her straight. Next day, Nellie started in again. Laura told her to stop. She didn't. Laura punched her in the nose and said, "Hard working folks only smell bad to folks who have nothing better to do than stick their noses in the air. Well, every time you stick your nose in the air with me, Nellie, it's gonna get punched." YES!

Personally, I will not get sucked into this - "be a 'better' person, just let it go, it doesn't matter anyway, Life here is an illusion, it's not about you, it's about them, don't take it personally" stuff. I want nothing more than to get along with everyone, but not everyone wants to get along with me or anyone else and I can't make them...this doesn't make me any less or more than someone who would choose these options. They just don't sit well in my, WOLF it is!!

~Half Moon Howlin'~

Friday, October 17, 2008

My Wolf'ness

I am Wolf
Sacred Wolf
Woman Wolf
I am Loyal and Friendly, Wild and Wise
I'll roll over and let you rub my belly
soft, hidden fur
But YOU have been hounding my borders
Backing me into corners
I'd like to attack YOU
rip out YOUR throat
yank out YOUR tongue
simply because I am Wolf
and Wolf is my nature
But don't worry yet
I won't do it THIS time
I'll reign in my wolf'ness
and say nothing direct
Because I AM WOLF
and YOU'RE really pissing me off!
So kindly STOP!
~Deep Breath and Release~

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


We live on 3.5 acres of mostly wooded land. Aaaaaadore it! I just never know what I'm going to get.

SURPRISE! ANIMALS - The other night we walked out the front door. I noticed something black out of the corner of my eye. Thought it was the outside black cat we feed. Then I saw the white stripe. I said to my husband, "Uuuhhhhh, that's a skunk" and quickly went back inside.

SURPRISE! INFORMATION - Last night we learned some new information: Apparently, we are not only feeding the outside cats, the birds, the squirrels, and the chipmunks....we're also feeding the opossum and the skunk. They were both out eating birdseed late last night.

SURPRISE! FLOWERS - A few months ago, I noticed something yellow on the hill around our house. I walked up to see this sweet'ness looking back at me. I didn't even have to plant it - it just showed up.

It happened again the other day - I found this growing in a pot I planted months ago with a totally different kind of flower. YAY - another flower just showing up to grace my life!

SURPRISE! WEEDS - Oh, we have tons of those. But I like the ones that not only SURPRISE! show up, but are sneaky hiders of their beauty. Like this for example: just a bunch of holey green stuff, right?

but underneath, even pointing toward the ground is this lil cutie flower.

SURPRISE! CATS - Never expected another cat and certainly not a preggers one! Still no kittens. When will they arrive? That's a SURPRISE! too.

SURPRISE! TREES - We have no large pine trees here. I must say I was little disappointed in that when we moved here. But as we 'cleaned up' different areas, we realized that we do have a ton of little ones scattered around. Just to give it some perspective, my hand. It's so teeny tiny and absolutely precious.

We even have one with long needles. Isn't it cute??

SURPRISE! WEATHER - Last week, they were talking about frost. This week, they're saying 80 degrees! Mmmmm, warm autumn days.

SURPRISE! MONEY - My husband was laid off his job in July. He received a package of a month's pay (plus some). Two days later he got another job. So, in essence, he got paid for an extra week's vacation AND for the next 4 weeks he was paid double from the old job and the new one! As a matter of fact, he already had the interview lined up (and probably would have gotten it) if his old 'stupid jerky' company had only waited two days, they could have saved themselves thousands of dollars. But Hey, what goes around, comes around.

Surprises come in many forms and many ways, but often we're just too busy and caught up in the life society tells us we should live to notice them. My downfall has always been being too focused on what I want to show up and not what does. "I'm getting better" (just to throw in a movie quote in my best english accent - anyone know what it is?) I wasn't always this positive. I'm still not always, but I'm thrilled to say that progress has been made in my war with negative thinking/feelings . Yesterday all it took was a nap to get back on track. I woke thinking, "It doesn't matter what people think or do, I should do what I want to do just because I want to do matter if no one ever pays any attention to crazy ca-ute lil ol me." Attention is over-rated by our egos!! And maybe mine makes a bigger deal of it than most. Pain in the hiney (is that how hiney is spelled?). That's no surprise to me, but the fact that I am over-coming it is. I never thought that would happen. I'm totally taken with thank-full'ness and grandly great-full! YAY EVERY DAY!

I'll end this with:

SURPRISE! HAIR - Not the kind that shows up on your chin one morning. No, no, this kind:

It's a little messy, but you get the point. Half of my hair is electric purple. When I wear it pulled back it's regular color in the front (see my profile picture when I had all 'normal' hair), purple in the back. I never thought of it before now, but it's kinda like an updated version of a mullet - all business in the front, party in back. heeheehaha! :)
What surprises have you been blessed with?

~SURPRISES! are The Universe's way of keeping The Journey from becoming a big long Yaaaaawwwwnnnn~

Friday, October 10, 2008


My Etsy banner.....

What do you think??
Now, I have to work on my products. I'm making some changes to the way I make journals....hopefully it will be up and running in the next few weeks. YAY!

~Lucky Charms~


Thursday, October 9, 2008

Making a banner for Etsy is

so much harder and more time consuming than I ever imagined. Or maybe I just don't know what I'm doing. My butt hurts. I'm totally tired. Ugh.

But it is almost ready.....and looking fan-freaking-tastic! Looking forward to opening my lil shoppy-shop.


Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Precious Moments

I can feel the kittens moving and kicking inside Zoe's belly. ~Ah~ I'm thankful that she is sharing her experience with us. Look how fat her belly is now.

Ooooo, I can't wait to see them!!!! Should be any time now. This is absolute MAGICK.


Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Wild and Unkempt Places (saying goodbye to all that green part 2)

This is what the side of our driveway/garage looks like. We haven't done a thing to it since we moved in.

Some would say, "Pretty 'BAD.'" My friend, who is a gardener and kept a 'garden of eden' of sorts for many years, would probably say, "Oh Melissa" with a disapproving look.

I do not feel ashamed - for I hold this belief very closely in my heart: Even BIG Sloppy Imperfect Messes have value. I can appreciate its wild, unkempt'ness. (So does the chipmunk - he lives in there somewhere.) My eyes see the relaxed state it exists in. It is a place of just letting go...of letting what will be to be...of allowing...of accepting...of embracing that which may not be embraced by 'society'. I can so relate to that.

Not everyone does or can believe in beautiful messes (chooses it??). Some are trapped by perfectionism - or as I like to call it, The Destructor, who will squash, crush, pulverize, and devourer all attempts at non-perfection. I have fought with this 'demon' for a long time in many different areas. (Secretly, I feel I am finally gaining the upper hand. But perhaps that could change at any to remain alert.)

Even places like this contain tiny beauty that waits for us to notice it.

Somewhere along my journey, I've learned that tiny beauty is so worth BIG UGLY. I didn't always know that and I wasn't always as content as I am. Now all I have to do is apply this wisdom to people. Should be easy......................right?

~Hot Chocolate on a Chilly Morning~


Friday, October 3, 2008

Saying goodbye to all that green (part 1)

It's that sleepy time of year. I'll miss the way the woods look right now - full of leafy goodness. But the wheel turns. It will turn around again.

Moss is sexy. The way it tucks its-self in and around delights me. I'm captivated by the BAM'e'ness of its green. I long to have no grass....only moss....a thick carpet all around. Its versatility is to be admired - it can grow on the ground,

on a brick,

or on an old hollowed out tree.

A sea of ferns. Come spring and summer, they over-take the woods. My husband says we're going to start a business here and call it "Worms and Ferns."

Sometimes there is a surprise in them.

He's the cat that eats our birds and my neighbor said we could shoot. I told him he's lucky we don't shoot animals.

The intricate way that Life will have Its-Self. Crawling, creeping, digging in here and there, compelled to LIVE and experience its-self and all it comes into contact with.

The wild flowers clinging, still sharing themselves, telling stories of warmer days past and those yet to come.

The calm'ness of Buddha, surrounded by sacred'ness.

Painted rocks adding their wisdom.

Secret Fairies blowing wishes into the breeze.

The first tree to change its beauty, to begin the release of what was in order to rest, renew, and make way for something else.

I'm blessed to live here, to be surrounded by all of this and more. I'm in love with it. I adore it. It adds countless precious moments to my journey. It blesses my eyes, makes my heart sing, awakens my soul, dances with my spirit, and entertains my mind. If it could be tasted, I think it would taste like chocolate cake eaten in a bubble bath...luxuriously comforting.

~Ah, deep breath, our Earth is exquisite in all her ways~